There are many changes when going through a divorce and life can feel like it is out of control. Every situation is different but often there are changes in finances, housing, friends and even family. It is a grieving process which is a natural response to the loss of any significant person, object, or circumstance. The mind becomes consumed with many questions such as “Why did this happen to me?”, “Why did he do this?”, and even “Why did God allow this to happen”.

Recovery means getting back capabilities and attributes back to be able to deal with the situation at hand and eventually move on to “How can I learn through this experience?”, “How can I now go on with my life?”, and “How can I learn who I really am now?” When the ‘how’ questions replace the ‘why’ questions one is starting to live with the reality of the loss. ‘Why’ questions reflect a search for meaning and purpose in loss. The ‘How’ questions reflect a way to adjust to the loss.